Kaleidoscope of Advice - Relationships

Does your love excite you
Invite you
Caress you
Surprise you
Ignite you
Like you
Love you
Feel you
Heal you
Renew you
Ballyhoo you
Seduce you
Induce you
Make you feel free
Like you were meant to be?

There must be
Unconditional trust
Unconditional Love… not lust
To keep two hearts alive
And letting marriage thrive.
Only Care can repair what neglect put there.

If you have this, you can fly
Take the shackles off your soul
Be made once again whole.
Soar the sky
See the light
Feel the magic
Be the one you were meant to be
BE FREE …
THAT IS WHAT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE DOES!

By Ann Leyh

I sometimes wonder what I’ve missed in my life,
Never having known true love, even as a wife.

I was never able to reveal my heart,
Or confide in my husband from the very start.

I never knew that feeling of complete safety and trust,
For all I was handed were put-downs, sex and lust.

What have I lost, what have I missed,
I’ve never been held or romantically kissed.

How can I get this lost love that I missed?
Or find someone who will hold me romantically to be kissed?

I feel so cheated because now I’m old,
And I have no one to love, to have or to hold.

I had so much to give and share down deep inside of me,
True love, companionship, compassion, but it wasn’t to be.

So today, I’m alone and empty, without a soul mate,
My desire wanes and the time remaining grows late,

Now I envy those who have had that special person sent from above,
And I’m sorry God never sent me anyone I could call my own true love.

But remember you need to ask the right questions to receive,
Then you will find a way to achieve,
Your wishes to be loved in this romantic way,
Loved, kissed and hugged in every way.

Just keep asking and you will receive, so you can change your fate,
I just never knew to ask until it was too late.

By Ann Leyh

Incompatibilities stay, they don’t change with marriage.
A different set of priorities don’t go away with the baby carriage.

Marriage intensifies any incompatibility.
It often remains even through senility.

Core value conflicts don’t change, they just hide.
They remain and become difficult to abide.

The best predictor of the future with someone is the past.
If there were problems then, they’ll continue to last.

Unless you prepare yourself for the future and try to change old way,
You’ll be the same for the rest of your married days.

Don’t let someone outside the marriage pressure and control you.
Or your commitment won’t last after you say “I do”.

Work must be done to prepare for each other.
When you get home, you must unwrap one another.

Then, you must live with what you find or with what you knew all along.
Or else your lives will turn out to be a fight, and that’s all wrong.

So, remember, if you both have different priorities, they won’t go away.
It’s a proven fact that they remain and intensify each and every day.

Do your work before you promise to love, honor, and obey,
And you’ll be happy forever, like you were on your wedding day.

By Ann Leyh

Being happy for the other person
When they are happy
Being sad for the other
Person when they are sad
Being together in good times
And being together in bad times
Love is the source of strength.

Being honest with yourself at all times
Being honest with the other person at all times
Telling, listening, respecting the truth
And never pretending
Love is the source of reality.

An understanding that is so complete that
You feel as if you are a part of the other person
Accepting the other person just the way they are
And not trying to change them to be something else
Love is the source of unity.

The freedom to pursue your own desires
While sharing your experiences with the other person
The growth of one individual alongside of
And together with the growth of another individual
Love is the source of success.

The excitement of planning things together
The excitement of doing things together
Love is the source of the future.

The fury of the storm
The calm of the rainbow
Love is the source of passion.

Giving and taking in a daily situation
Being patient with each other’s needs and desires
Love is the source of sharing.

Knowing that the other person
Will always be with you regardless of what happens
Missing the other person when they are away
But remaining near in heart at all times
Love is the source of security.

Love is the source of life.

By Ann Leyh

How could love so promising and true
Wreck such havoc upon your family and you.
Forty years of marriage and promises made for life
Apparently lacked meaning for you, as you cheated on your wife.

Not one deterring thought ever entered your mind
As you went on trips and danced with any woman you could find.

Then, home you’d come like the hard working mate,
At one or two in the morning saying you had worked quite late.

Most men seem to have one big problem that really makes me sick,
They think not with their heads, they think with their Dick,

Until this defect is corrected and on the mend,
It will continue to bring true love to an end.

By Ann Leyh

Divorce is like a funeral that you must endure,
There’s no quick fix, there’s no easy cure.
At first there’s shock, anger, hurt, then pain,
Followed by feelings that life’s not worth living again.

Divorce is a terrible thing to endure
Because the feelings take a long time to cure.
After a divorce everything familiar disappears.
Recovery can take anywhere from one to tow years.
Feelings are skewed, families are broken, hearts fall apart.
Oh how you wish it could be like it was at the start.

The grieving process is similar to the death of a loved one.
Starting over isn’t easy, after someone is gone.
One goes through stages of holding on, then the letting go.
Only in this way can you restore and begin to know,
That life does go on after love is dissolved,
If you forgive, then your regrets can be absolved.

You must put yourself back together again.
You must climb back to the surface, find yourself, and then,
Reshape your life, set new goals, find your heart’s desire.
Know that you can set the world on fire!
Then you’ll be ready to face life with hope and a smile,
And, perhaps, you’ll even be able to love again after a while.

Say “goodbye” to the life you had.
Be positive, be happy, don’t be depressed and sad.
Believe in yourself, see life in a different light.
Divorce leaves you vulnerable, but don’t give up.. fight!

Celebrate it met Glee!
Because you are Free!

By Ann Leyh

The four horsemen of a troubled relationship are: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.
This results in emotional and physical disengaging, bellowed by name calling.

Most marriages have arguments from time to time with regularity,
The disagreements are rooted in fundamental differences of lifestyle, values or personality.

Fighting over these differences only waste time and the marriage is harmed.
Only by finding the bottom line difference that’s causing conflict and learn to live with it, can the arguments be disarmed.

Relationships are habits and if the habit is to be loving, then love grows,
If the habits lean toward seeing the negative side, then love goes.

Try to get back in touch with your partner and determine what first captured your heart.
See each other as best friends… that’s the way to start.

It doesn’t take someone who’s super smart,
To learn early that relationships are definitely an art.

By Ann Leyh

Don’t cry over anyone who won’t cry over you,
Because it’s obvious that you care more for them then they for you.

The hurtful things they do without a thought or care
Show that they place no value on your being there.

So don’t waste one minute of your life being sad,
Or you’ll miss the good stuff and that would be bad.

No one can go back and make a new beginning,
So start now and make a brand new ending.

Free your heart from hatred,
Free your mind from worry.

Live simply
Give more
Expect less.

By Ann Leyh

Marriage is a commitment to something greater than yourself.
Marriage is based on giving to one another.
The most important day of your marriage is tomorrow.
The only condition for loving is to love without conditions.
Love is not something you have.
It’s something you do.

Always think of yourselves as “us”, not “me and you”.

People are more important than things.

Don’t sweat the small stuff, and remember, most stuff is small.

Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience.

The deepest need of all mankind
Is the need to be needed ‘til the end of time.

By Ann Leyh

Late night work, weekends away,
With another you began to stay.

You picked up women at bars for sex,
And left your wife like a discarded “ex”.

“It was because you were misunderstood, ” you said,
You wanted attention, especially in bed.

Was it mid-life crises or just your selfish needs,
That caused you to commit those unconscionable deeds?

Whatever the reason, all trust is gone,
And feelings are cold where they once were warm.

Never did I doubt your faithfulness to me,
So guess who the joke’s on… the jokes on me!

By Ann Leyh