Kaleidoscope of Advice - Parenthood

Your first child is usually the “experimental model”,
On it you learn diapering and how to give a bottle.
If things are too quiet, you worry and fret.
When he cries, you wonder if it’s because he’s dry or wet.

When at last the little one is quiet and fast asleep,
You wonder if he’s still breathing, so you go and take a peep.
You tiptoe for that reassuring look, and pull up the cover,
And you wonder if he knows that you’re his doting mother.

Questions go through your mind at a rapid pace.
So much to do and so much responsibility to face.
Am I feeding him too much or too little?
Are his bones really so tiny, and are they brittle?

How did his fingernails get so long?
Does he like to be sung to sleep with a song?
Do babies always fret so much when cutting teeth?
Should parents have to endure such crying and such grief?

How do you teach him to blow his nose?
Quick, someone get me a siphon hose.
How do you teach him to eat with a spoon?
Oh, whatever happened to the honeymoon?

What! It’s time for a potty-chair?
How do you get him to go sit there?
How many “no, no’s” does it take,
To teach him that glass and China really do break?

Look, look! Did you see what he did?
He pushed down the other kid.
Now, what do we do, and what do we say?
No, no, that isn’t the way!

Gosh, how did Mom teach us wrong from right?
Did she say it’s wrong to argue and fight?
Somehow, she taught us that Love is the way,
And she showered us with hugs and kisses every day.

So, a good parent must set a good example to follow,
Then discipline is not so hard for a child to swallow.
Set aside time to spend with him each day,
For this, in the end, is what will pay.

Children grow up with low self-esteem,
If parents try to be too hard or too mean.
So give your child a mixture of all of the above,
And all questions will be answered where there is Love.

By Ann Leyh

I know I’m responsible for my life and decisions,
And I’ve learned that the best way to avoid “head-on collisions”,
Is not to be irresponsible and blame others with your harsh verbal assault,
But to say to yourself, “Everything that’s wrong with me is my parents’ fault.

They molded me to fit their notion of the ideal child,
So why did I turn out to be so mischievous and wild?
Perhaps they preached too much about wrong and right
When I came home late, long after curfew, at night.
Maybe more spankings would have helped my character grow,
Even though I felt that my parents were from another time and just didn’t know.

So, the best advice I have for those who want to be in your child’s memories tomorrow,
Is to become a part of his memories today and experience both the joy and sorrow.

Life is made up, not of great sacrifices, but of little things and small obligations,
This, if known long ago, would have helped to bridge the widening gaps between successive generations.

It’s funny that I have realized too late
That all those things in my parents I used to hate,
Will, one day, be realized by my own children and become their fate.

It’s common knowledge that children are such a great comfort in our old age…we know this is true,
And, yes, they helped us get there faster.. this, all of us already knew.

By Ann Leyh

Having a child means total sacrifice for someone else.
You’re facing 20 years of care and denying yourself.

You can’t go away and leave like you did with a cat.
Children go along too, with all their necessities and that’s that.

So, be certain the time is right for having a baby,
Because one it’s there, there’s no if, and or maybe.

Marriage sometimes takes a turn for the worst when kids appear and life gets wild.
The quality of your sex life begins to lag as everything is scheduled around your child.

Kids need to be folded into your relationship and into your life,
Everyone gets cheated when a couple stops being husband and wife.

The lifestyle you choose creates or influences your child’s existence.
So just remember that children have lots of energy, sleepless nights, and persistence.

If their would is filled with yelling, fighting, and lack of patience, everyone gets cheated.
You pull apart as a couple and the kids pay the price, every discussion begins and ends with arguments that are heated.

Make sure you’re ready to be a parent and that you possess patience and ability.
Because being parents is a privilege and an awesome responsibility.

By Ann Leyh

I know I’m guilty of harboring hate.
I wanted everyone to feel like I did about my mate.

Just because my feelings had been bruised
And I felt unloved and abused,

I wanted my daughters to feel about their dad as I did,
And that was selfish and immature; I acted like a kid.

I know it’s not right because he’ll always be their dad,
Regardless of the circumstances, he’s their father, good or bad.

So, I resolve to hold my feelings in check as his ex-wife,
And let them share and be a part of his life.

No matter how much it hurts!

By Ann Leyh

There are little eyes upon you,
And they’re watching night and day,
There are little ears that quickly
Take in every word you say.

There are little hands all eager
To do anything you do;
And a little child who’s dreaming,
Of the day he’ll be like you.

You’re the little baby’s idol,
You’re the wisest of the wise,
In his little mind about you
No suspicions ever rise.

He believes in you devoutly,
Stores all you say and do;
He will say an do, in your way
When he’s grown up just like you.

There’s a wide-eyed little baby
Who believes you’re always right;
And his eyes are always opened,
And he watches day and night.

You are setting an example
Every day in all you do:
For the little child who’s waiting
To grow up to be like you.

By Ann Leyh

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I’d finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.

I would care to know less and know to care more.
I’d take more hikes and fly more kites.
I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I’d do more hugging and less tugging.

I’d see the oak tree in the acorn more often.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I’d model less about the love of power,
And more about the power of love.

By Ann Leyh

The bond between mother and daughter is deep,
It’s there forever, always to keep.
Mother’s have all been a daughter at one time,
So the bond continues beyond all reason and rhyme.

Each seems to know when the other has needs,
They rush to help…whatever the deeds.
I know I’d walk through fire if needed,
That’s also how I know I’d be treated.

So all who doubt, take notice and try to comprehend,
That the love between a mother and daughter will never end.

By Ann Leyh

A baby arrives with no pain or fear.
It’s a blank book when it arrives here.
You, the parents, imprint the child’s mind.
Prejudice, hate, fear….everything you find
Was put there by the parents who became a model.
They instilled these feelings as the baby began to toddle.

If only parents realized that they are watched and mirrored each day,
Perhaps they’d become careful as they teach and play.
Because without this realization, bad feelings will exist an remain.
And the world will never be rid of prejudice and pain.
So the next time you say something derogatory or rude,
Just stop and realize that your child will be just as crude.

Leave a model for your child that is descent and kind,
And he’ll grow up to be strong and good with an unprejudiced mind!

By Ann Leyh